Finally. Someone who understands my calves. "Without a doubt, my best attributes are my calves. I don't know if they're earned or genetic, but they're almost comically muscular, the equivalent of Popeye's forearms. For years I was complimented on them. Strangers stopped me in the streets. But that all changed with the widespread availability of implants. Now when people look at my legs I sense them wondering why I didn't have my [behind] done at the same time. It's how women with naturally shapely breasts must feel- robbed and full of rage." David Sedaris